What about the glass?

Is a glass half-full or half-empty?

• Pessimist: The glass is half-empty.
• Optimist: The glass is half-full.
• Engineer: The glass is twice as large as it needs to be.
• Ecologist: The glass would be completely full if not for global warming.
• Accountant: Do you really need all that water?
• Quantum physicist: Within the glass there is a 50% chance of encountering water.
• Capitalist: Supplies are limited, order your water now!
• Communist: Water rations are halved this year, comrade.
• Surrealist: The cow is half banana.
• Nihilist: What glass?
• Nuclear physicist: If we knew when the glass was completely full, or we wait for the glass to be a quarter full, we can measure the half-life of water.
• Astrophysicist: Within half of the observable glass, there are billions and billions of water molecules affected by a gravitational incline.
• Gamer: This is just enough to get me to the well just beyond blue base.  I'll refill there and get the flag on the way back.
• Analytical chemist: There is a liquid-phase mixture of hydrogen and oxygen in a two-to-one molar ratio, covalently bonded; a gas mixture of 78% diatomic nitrogen, 21% diatomic oxygen, and 1% other gases; confined within an open mouthed container of an amorphous silicate solid.
• Mythbuster: Water in the glass, FIRE IN THE HOLE!
• Nutritionist: You need sixteen of these a day.
• Physician: Only half of this should be given intravenously, and only after adding 5% glucose by mass.
• Computer scientist: It has to be either full or empty, unless we're using a quantum computer!
• Theoretical physicist: You fool!  You altered the quantity of water in the glass by observing it!
• Plasma physicist: Whoops, the water just evaporated.
• Survivalist: Come near what's left of my water and I'll blow your head off.
• Pragmatist: Just let me drink the damn water already!

On another note, I got together with a couple of the Master Minds to do an episode of "Out Of Our Minds:"